A light humorous post because I am behind in my writings on very stern and serious topics that must not be laughed at. Much of my site(s) traffic these days comes from search engines and sometimes people say funny things in search engines. Collected below are the strange ways people have come upon me in 2007 (all of these are printed as is from the search engine, spelling mistakes, grammatical adventures, and ridiculousness as authored).
First off some strange searches that got people to various parts of patrickgage.com (some of these ending up here I seriously question):
- “rejected from carnegie mellon”
- burnt orange wedding scroll invitations software
- cheating and lying husband poems
- font for texas car plates
- pictures of quilts made 137 years ago
- red haired woman did very good whistling songs
- ruby and i went to pittsburgh on the river
Other common searches involved icelandic weddings, which I am now seemingly an expert on, people looking to steal license plates, and an awful lot of people wanting to not get rejected to CMU.
But much funnier this year were searches that came into Reading to the Rain including:
- feel sad for kids having a such a heartless dad
- g k chesterton chauvanist pig
- horribly depressing short stories
- i am so tired of being surrounded by stupid people
- illustrations, underwater, reading, rain
- refreshing scent ii francine
- show me a non-fiction story written in first person
- stories on rain or rain creatures
- the story of a chubby girl with questions
- things what don’t work until you’ve given them a good thumping
And also a number of questions that people ask that bring them to a site full of book reviews:
- what fiction does the disabled read?
- what historical figure is captain planet based on?
- why should people read rain boys?
- why why love mike raine?
- how do women show weakness in a married?
- how far in the past does fiction have to be set to make it historicalfiction?
Also, big hits this year were “naked pictures” of just about every author on the site due to Heather’s posting of Naked Pictures of Famous People by Jon Stewart. Furthermore every combination you can think of of “naked pictures” and “rain” also came up, leading me to believe there is a huge market for pictures of naked people in downpours that really seriously needs to be explored.
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